I am the disposable girl.

No one calls. A few rarely email.

No one outside of my immediate family cares how I am doing, how I feel, or what I need.

I could be dead on the floor with my face eaten away by the dog and no one would notice for weeks - until I didn't show up for work for a few days, then maybe they'd send the police to do a welfare check.

"Online" friends are a joke. I'm just another number on a facebook page or another name on myspace. Stroke the ego. Watch the numbers go up. Fuck that, and fuck you.

I can count the number of people who care for me on one hand. Literally.

The only thing keeping me from ending it all is my parents and my sisters. I love them too much to destroy their lives, which is what my death, accidental or not, would do.

I used to be the girl that GAVE the parties. Now I don't even get invitations to parties.

Everyone has their own life, and I'm not a part of it.

So I'm moving on with mine.

Alone.